Truthiness

Night creams, day creams, creams for your wrinkling decollete, creams for rough elbows, creams for rough days (TAKE A GODDAMN CALGON MOMENT YOU UNFEMININE AUTOMATON), cellulite erasers, spanx, lip plumpers, hair straighteners, high heels, push-up bras, self tanning lotions, shellac manicures, brazilian waxes, microdermabrasion, eyelash extensions, hair extensions, chemical peels, teeth whitening, diet pills, diet drops, diet drinks, vajazzling, rhinoplasty, labiaplasty, liposuction, butt implants, cheek implants, hair transplants…

Play us the theme song, Beyoncé!

Appeasing the cold weather blues

Every year around this time I get truly disappointed that summer is indeed over. And every year around this time, I have to make a couple online clothes purchases that make that fact a little more tolerable. Thanks to a gift card or two and some intrepid sales scouting, I have the below items currently en route to my mailbox.

I swear, if you know where my mailbox is and you come and swipe my clothes before I gleefully arrive home, I will hunt you down. I WILL CUT YOU.

Double breasted military sweater jacket, orange leather flats, grey lace-up oxford booties, cotton cashmere wrap sweater and black lace leggings.

Ok, that makes fall and winter a little more approachable. I’m already picturing all of my mix and match options.